The Invictus Games Closing Ceremony: A Disappointing Lineup
The closing ceremony of the Invictus Games is shaping up to be one of the most anticlimactic events since the Titanic's launch, according to Robin McVicker, COO of the Invictus Games. He claims this event will be exciting, though one can't help but feel there are fingers crossed behind the scenes.
On November 20th, the list of performers was announced, featuring Bare Naked Ladies, Jelly Roll, and the duo War and Treaty. Jelly Roll, also known as the artist behind Harry's neck tattoo, is best described as a mediocre musician at best. While he brings a chaotic energy, when your headliner is better known for his ink than his musical talent, the event's credibility is in question.
Next up, we have Bare Naked Ladies—a Canadian band whose heyday was somewhere between the 1990s and reruns of *That '70s Show*. They were great back in the day, but now they seem more like a nostalgic act. Canadians might give them a polite golf clap, while others will likely be Googling their name as the music plays.
Then there’s War and Treaty. They might be lovely people, but honestly, I couldn't pick them out of a crowd, even if they were wearing neon signs. This encapsulates how many of us feel about the lineup. McVicker claims Harry had input in booking the acts, but it seems more likely he tried to secure true superstars and received a polite brush-off instead.
It’s disheartening to see the Invictus Games—once a monumental tribute to wounded service personnel—reduced to this. With a megastar running the show, the results speak for themselves. Her involvement has been controversial, characterized by attention-seeking behavior, inappropriate attire, and a complete lack of military cadence. It feels as though they might as well have rolled out a red carpet for her.
As for David Foster, often referred to as Harry's second father, he’s mysteriously absent. Why hasn’t he stepped in to arrange a star-studded lineup for his son? After all, he’s worked with A-listers like Celine Dion, Barbra Streisand, and Andrea Bocelli. Instead, we’re left with Jelly Roll and a band that peaked in the '90s. It’s almost as if Foster looked at Harry’s vision for Invictus and thought, “Nope, not my circus, not my monkeys.”
We've heard plenty of buzz about bringing in high-profile performers like Beyoncé. If Harry had even a fraction of the budget he spends on those extravagant photo ops, he might have been able to entice Queen Bey for a cool million or two. Instead, we’re left with a lineup that feels like a participation trophy.
And let's not forget about Michael Bublé, the Canadian crooner, who is notably absent. He likely prefers to stay far away from this spectacle, avoiding any association with a headliner whose main claim to fame is a tattoo. Bublé would probably rather perform at a corporate gig than align himself with Harry's circus.
As for ticket sales, it seems Central Casting may need to arrange for a busload of people to fill the seats. The event could have resurrected any '80s one-hit wonder and it would have been just as memorable as what we’re about to witness. Taylor Swift, Katy Perry, Celine Dion, or even Justin Bieber would have made for a far better choice.
In summary, if Harry and Meghan can’t even manage a decent performance lineup for their pet project, it raises the question: what exactly are they bringing to the table? Perhaps it’s time for them to face the music—just not at the Invictus Games closing ceremony.
