Watching this Hollywood dream crash and burn feels like watching the longest-running reality show finally reach its season finale, and what a finale it is!
The Hollywood Reporter, which is essentially the bible of Hollywood, has just called out the Sussexes, putting them on their "biggest losers of 2023" list. Can you believe it? Of course, you can! What’s even more delicious about this is that it’s coming from the very industry they’ve been trying to break into. All those grand announcements and multimillion-dollar deals? Well, it turns out, Hollywood isn’t buying what they’re selling.
Let’s break it down. First, their Netflix documentary. The one where they spent six hours talking about how much they wanted privacy, while sharing every intimate detail of their lives. The Hollywood Reporter didn’t mince words: it wasn’t groundbreaking, it wasn’t revolutionary, it was just whiny.
And then there's Harry. Remember when he was the cheeky prince everyone loved? The soldier who served his country and created the Invictus Games? Now he’s just airing every family grievance and trying to make a quick buck to please his wife.
Here’s where it gets even juicier. Earlier this year, WME (William Morris Endeavor), one of the biggest talent agencies in Hollywood, signed Meghan Markle. Her fans were celebrating, thinking this was her big break into Hollywood. Well, sources now say WME is scrambling to figure out what to do with her. When your own agency can’t even figure out how to market you, that’s a pretty bad sign.
And can we talk about the disaster that was Endgame? While they claim they had nothing to do with it, we all know Omit Scobby is basically their unofficial spokesperson. The Dutch translation debacle? A PR nightmare! The people they’re trying to impress in Hollywood are watching all this and wondering if they really want to be associated with this drama.
What's really telling is a source from WME who said that regardless of whether Meghan had anything to do with Endgame, the fact remains that its contents have backfired massively on her and Harry. Even if they weren’t directly involved, people automatically assume they are because their brand is so toxic. This is what happens when you build a brand on grievance and victimhood. It might get you some attention, but eventually, people get tired of it.
Remember when Spotify’s Bill Simmons called them "grifters"? That wasn’t just a random comment—it was from a major figure in the entertainment industry. And now, with The Hollywood Reporter calling them out as "losers," it seems the entire industry is finally saying what we've all known for a while.
And let's look at William and Catherine. They’re out there doing real work—making real changes and showing what true royal service looks like. No drama, no leaks, no desperate need for attention. Just dignity and commitment to their roles. The contrast between them and the Sussexes couldn’t be more stark.
Speaking of William and Catherine, can we just appreciate how they’ve handled all the accusations from Harry and Meghan? Every time the Sussexes throw something their way, William and Catherine respond with pure class. Never complain, never explain. And look at how well it’s working for them—while Harry and Meghan are being labeled as Hollywood’s biggest losers, William and Catherine’s popularity is growing.
Let’s talk about Meghan’s Hollywood career. Remember all those rumors about her big comeback? Where are those projects? The only thing we’ve seen is some Instagram posts and staged paparazzi shots. For someone who was supposed to be Hollywood’s next big thing, that’s a pretty poor showing.
And those paparazzi shots? It’s funny how, for people who supposedly hate attention, they always seem to know exactly where the cameras are. Hollywood sees right through it. The industry insiders are no longer offering polite responses—they’re openly criticizing them now. When The Hollywood Reporter calls your brand "a sanctimonious bubble begging to be popped," it’s not just criticism; it’s a warning.
And then there’s the South Park episode. When they make you the target of their satire, you know you’ve hit a new low. The episode on their "Worldwide Privacy Tour" was so spot-on, it was almost painful to watch. Actually, who am I kidding? It was hilarious.
What’s really interesting is the complete silence from the Sussex camp. Normally, they’d be quick to respond to any perceived slight with their army of lawyers and PR people, but this time? Nothing. Maybe because they can’t argue when the entire industry is turning its back on them.
Now, let’s talk about Ari Emanuel. He’s one of the most powerful people in Hollywood, and when he starts seeing you as a liability rather than an asset, that’s game over. There are rumors that WME’s relationship with Meghan is on the rocks, and trust me, that’s not just gossip—it’s a sign of a burning bridge.
And let’s not forget about Harry. Remember when he was one of the most popular royals, the soldier prince who created Invictus Games? Now, he’s just a footnote in Meghan’s Hollywood adventure. He was born into one of the most prestigious families in the world, and now he’s essentially a background character in a D-list celebrity story.
Compare that to William and Catherine’s treatment when they visit the U.S. They’re treated like true royalty, getting meetings with power players and making real impact. Meanwhile, Harry and Meghan are trying to grab attention any way they can.
And their content strategy? Well, it’s been underwhelming at best. Their Netflix shows flopped, their Spotify deal crashed, and their book ventures have left them more isolated than ever. For people who were supposed to revolutionize media, they haven’t produced much of substance.
The irony is, they had it all. As working royals, they had the world’s goodwill, they had everything going for them. But they chose to chase Hollywood, not realizing that it’s a whole different game. In Hollywood, you're only as good as your last project, and right now, their projects have all failed.
Some of their supporters are trying to spin this as a good thing—that being called losers by The Hollywood Reporter means they’re disrupting the system. But no, that’s not disruption, that’s destruction of their own brand.
So, what does the future hold for them? They’ve burned their bridges with the royal family, alienated the Hollywood elite, and their brand is toxic in both the UK and the US. Their only real source of income now seems to be trading on their royal connections—the very thing they claimed to want to escape.
In short, their public perception has taken a major hit, and now it’s harder than ever to market them. It didn’t have to be this way. They could have had a wonderful life as working royals, making a real difference. Instead, they chose drama, victimhood, and constant attention-seeking, and now they’re paying the price.
But maybe this is the wake-up call they need. Maybe being labeled Hollywood’s biggest losers will make them realize their current strategy isn’t working. Though, given their track record, I wouldn’t hold my breath.
And while all of this is happening, guess who’s thriving? That’s right—William and Catherine. The people they tried to tear down are more popular than ever. King Charles is settling into his role beautifully, and Queen Camilla has won over even her harshest critics. The institution they tried to damage is stronger than ever.
So there you have it, my friends. The Hollywood dream is over. The emperor has no clothes. The bubble has burst, and all that's left are two people who traded real significance for hollow celebrity, only to see even that slipping through their fingers.
