Let's take a trip down memory lane. Remember the massive buzz around Prince Harry’s four-book deal with Penguin Random House? Ah, how that contract has aged—like milk left out in the sun. The deal was reportedly worth a staggering £40 million, with Harry pocketing £20 million for *Spare*, his tell-all memoir that made headlines as the fastest-selling memoir ever. But where are the other three books?
The deal was supposed to include a book on leadership and charity work, Meghan Markle’s wellness guide (because, of course, we all need life advice from her), and a mystery book, rumored to be about... well, who knows? But here we are, two years later, and there’s been radio silence—no updates, no manuscripts, and certainly no answers. PR teams are left wringing their hands, wondering if Harry and Meghan took the money and ran.
Now, let’s talk about *Spare*. Sure, it set sales records on day one, moving 1.4 million copies, but was it really the success it was cracked up to be? Local supermarkets quickly had piles of *Spare* in bargain bins, marked down to £5. Thrift stores reportedly turned away donations because they were drowning in unsold copies. Oh, and did we mention that *Spare* was crowned the most-returned book of 2023? Even the paperback release tanked harder than Harry’s polo career. For a bestseller, the hype fizzled out faster than Meghan’s podcast ambitions.
Royal experts speculate that the deal might not have been for four books after all. Instead, it could have been more of a “let’s start with one and see how it goes” kind of deal. After all, no publisher is handing out millions to someone who can’t deliver. PR probably had an option to publish more books if Harry ever produced anything worth reading... spoiler alert: he didn’t.
Why hasn’t Harry delivered? Well, for starters, writing takes effort, and Harry’s not exactly known for his work ethic. The content of *Spare* was already dry—what else is there to write about? He aired all the family drama in that book; a second memoir would just be a rehash. Public interest has all but disappeared, with most people thinking, “We’ve heard enough. Thanks, but no thanks.” And Meghan’s wellness book? Don’t hold your breath. Unless it’s titled *How to Alienate Your Family in 10 Steps*, it’s probably not happening.
Here’s a theory: Maybe Meghan’s holding out for a divorce, hoping to cash in on her own tell-all. Think about it—diaries filled with juicy details about the Sussex saga, without needing to share the profits with Harry. Meanwhile, PR is probably praying for something to salvage this trainwreck of a deal. Penguin Random House has every right to demand their money back. What was supposed to be a four-book deal has turned into a one-book ordeal, and the Sussexes show no signs of fulfilling their end of the contract.
Maybe next time PR will think twice before handing millions to a couple whose main skill seems to be complaining. As for Harry and Meghan? They'll keep on “skid-markling” their way through life, leaving a mess behind and wondering why no one wants to clean it up.
