Meghan Markle, often dubbed the "Duchess of Delusion" and the "Queen of Contrived Hype," is back in the spotlight—and not for reasons that flatter her. According to a recent blind item on Crazy Days and Nights (CDAN), the former royal is allegedly orchestrating a bold yet questionable marketing strategy to create the illusion of overwhelming demand for her latest venture.
The plan? Reportedly hiring people to flood two pop-up stores and purchase her yet-to-be-released products, making it appear as though the world can’t get enough of whatever overpriced items she’s selling this time. If this sounds familiar, it’s because it’s a page straight out of the celebrity vanity project playbook.
This isn’t Meghan’s first attempt at artificially inflating demand. Remember The Bench, her heartfelt but largely unreadable picture book that mysteriously "sold out" while simultaneously gathering dust on discount shelves? Rumors circulated that bulk purchases were made under the guise of donations, ensuring the book achieved bestseller status—at least on paper.
Now, it seems the same tactics are being recycled, but this time, the stage is retail. Once upon a time, the so-called "Meghan Effect" allegedly caused handbags and dresses to fly off the shelves whenever she wore them. These days, however, her influence seems to have faded. If she still had the power to sway consumer demand, designers would be lining up to sign her. Instead, the only demand she appears to generate is for damage control at the brands she’s associated with.
So, how does this alleged scheme work? Picture this: a select group of strategically placed shoppers darting in and out of pop-up stores, making staggered purchases with different payment methods to create the illusion of organic demand. It’s a logistical nightmare, but for Meghan, it’s all part of the game.
The goal? Headlines proclaiming, "Meghan’s Pop-Up Stores Swept Clean in Hours!" Never mind that the products are likely sitting in a storage unit somewhere, ready to be strategically gifted to hotels, airlines, and charities as "heartfelt tokens of appreciation." Sound familiar? It should—this is the same playbook used to prop up The Bench.
While this strategy might work in the short term, it’s not foolproof. Real businesses track sales volume, and stores will quickly notice if the same credit cards are being used or the same people are cycling in and out. As one insider quipped, "Texas, for example, won’t be fooled. She has exactly zero fans there."
Even Netflix, ever the willing enabler, might eventually catch on. Imagine the streaming giant falling for the ruse, only to realize that Meghan’s "charisma and influence" don’t translate to actual sales. As one critic put it, "When the public won’t buy in organically, she’ll just manufacture the illusion of a shopping frenzy."
This latest scandal is just another chapter in Meghan’s ongoing struggle to stay relevant. From her underwhelming Netflix deal to the questionable transparency of the Archewell Foundation, her ventures have consistently fallen short of expectations. Polls show her approval ratings in the UK hovering at a dismal 19%, with Harry’s not far ahead at 23%.
As the world watches, one thing is clear: Meghan Markle’s reign as the Duchess of Delusion is far from over. Whether it’s books, pop-up stores, or overpriced jam, her ability to generate real demand remains questionable. And while she may continue to rely on smoke and mirrors, the public is growing increasingly skeptical of her antics.
So, when’s launch day? Let’s just say the only thing likely to sell out is patience.
