Meghan Markle is back in the spotlight, and this time, it’s with yet another rebrand of her much-hyped lifestyle venture. The former *American Riviera Orchard* has now been magically transformed into *As Ever*, proving that when in doubt, a name change can make it seem like this was the plan all along.
Meghan made her grand announcement via Instagram in a classic overproduced, soft-focus video. The clip featured a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it cameo from Prince Harry, who mumbled, “It’s recording,” like the world’s most reluctant production assistant. In the video, Meghan spoke about her rebrand with the confidence of someone who almost had their paperwork in order. She nostalgically recounted how she initially thought *American Riviera Orchard* was a great name—spoiler alert: the trademark office didn’t agree—before pivoting to *As Ever*. According to her, the new name allows for a broader range of products.
And what products, you ask? Oh, just a little bit of everything: jams, bedspreads, candles, gardening tools, kitchen knives, skincare, textiles, and even cutlery. Because nothing screams cohesive branding like artisanal jam sitting next to a pair of pruning shears.
As always, Meghan couldn’t resist a subtle nod to her past struggles, hinting at how she wasn’t able to share her love of cooking, crafting, and gardening while under the “oppressive” monarchy. Because, of course, nothing says royal oppression like not being able to post a sourdough recipe on Instagram. She also referenced her now-defunct blog, *The Tig*, as if it somehow validates her authority on everything from marmalade to luxury candles.
But wait, there’s more. Meghan casually dropped the bombshell that Netflix isn’t just backing her TV show—they’re also supporting her business. Because clearly, when you’re an ex-royal, one streaming deal just isn’t enough. This means *As Ever* products will reportedly be sold at Netflix’s brick-and-mortar stores in two U.S. malls. And if that sounds desperate, it gets better. Fans discovered an abandoned Shopify site for *American Riviera Orchard* that mysteriously vanished, making it painfully obvious that *As Ever* was a last-minute pivot. Nothing says strong business strategy like deleting your old store before the new one is even fully up and running.
Now, let’s talk about the name itself: *As Ever*. As in, “as it’s always been.” Except, what’s always been? Meghan’s track record of failed projects? The fact that no one asked for this? Some have pointed out that the name sounds less like a luxury brand and more like a passive-aggressive way to sign off a text message. One person hilariously noted that it sounds like a mashup of “as if” and “whatever,” which, honestly, would be a far more fitting brand name.
And let’s not forget Meghan’s habit of signing her Instagram posts with “As Ever, Meghan,” turning even the most sentimental messages into a low-budget marketing campaign. Imagine signing your birthday card with “Yours Truly, Coca-Cola.”
If Meghan is to be believed, *As Ever* has been in the works since 2022. Yet, after two years, all we’ve gotten is a rushed Instagram video, a brand reveal that no one understands, a product line that doesn’t exist yet, a mysteriously deleted Shopify store, and a still-pending trademark application. Seriously, this is two years of work? At this point, even Fyre Festival was better executed.
This isn’t Meghan’s first branding misstep, and it certainly won’t be her last. Whether it’s the ill-fated *American Riviera Orchard*, the vague *Archewell* projects, or the short-lived *Archetypes* podcast, the pattern is clear: lots of hype, no execution.
The internet isn’t buying it. As one unimpressed observer put it, “As ever, still not spending a penny on her crap.” Others pointed out that they wouldn’t trust anything Meghan cooked, with one user quipping that she gives off “unwashed vibes.”
At this point, Meghan might want to rethink her business ventures. Because if this is “as it’s always been,” then maybe it’s time for something new.
