Italians, Brace Yourselves: Meghan Markle’s Take on Pasta Sparks Outrage
Meghan Markle, in her infinite wisdom, has decided that centuries of Italian culinary tradition are merely suggestions, not rules. Her new Netflix cooking show, With Love, Meghan, premiered with an episode that left Italians—and food enthusiasts worldwide—utterly baffled. The episode featured Meghan preparing what she called "skillet spaghetti," a dish that many true Italians would argue is nothing short of an abomination.
The episode kicked off with a cardinal sin: Meghan referred to pasta as "noodles." For Italians, this is akin to blasphemy. Pasta, a cornerstone of Italian cuisine, is not to be lumped in with a pack of instant ramen. But the culinary faux pas didn’t stop there.
Instead of following the tried-and-true method of cooking pasta in a pot of salted boiling water, Meghan opted for a shortcut. She simply dumped dry spaghetti into a pan, added three cups of water, and let it sit—no boiling, no stirring, just what she described as "vibes."
Somewhere in Italy, a nonna likely clutched her chest and collapsed at the sight. Meghan casually explained to her audience that this is how she cooks for Prince Harry and their children, Archie and Lilibet. One can only assume this is also why they never ask for seconds.
Social media wasted no time in roasting the episode. One user quipped, "Netflix paid a lot of money just to let us know Meghan Markle doesn’t know how to cook pasta." Another added, "Next, she’ll show us how to make frozen pizza."
Viewers didn’t hold back on their critiques of the dish itself. One lamented, "She overcooked the noodles—slimy looking." Another echoed the sentiment, saying, "It looks like she made some sort of soup, cooked the vegetables to hell, tossed in some spaghetti, and called it a day."
Just when it seemed things couldn’t get worse, Meghan topped off her creation by grating what she mispronounced as "parmigian" cheese. Italian chefs everywhere likely felt a shiver run down their spines. Gordon Ramsay is probably drafting an angry tweet as we speak.
To add insult to injury, Meghan proudly shared that she makes this dish in such large quantities that she can pack the leftovers in her kids’ lunchboxes. As if no other parent has ever thought of saving leftovers. Truly groundbreaking.
The cherry on top of this culinary catastrophe? Meghan’s attempt to be relatable by comparing the dish to Beyoncé’s song "Cozy." We can only assume this means the spaghetti was overcooked and drowning in liquid.
The most egregious crime of all is the implication that Italians have been doing it wrong all along. Hundreds of years of perfected techniques, sacred family recipes passed down through generations, and Meghan waltzes in with her lackluster dish, saying, "No, no, just pour some lukewarm water on it."
What’s next? Telling the French they’ve been making croissants wrong? Explaining to the Japanese how to properly prepare sushi? Meghan, we get it—you’re trying to be quirky and authentic. But maybe, just maybe, leave pasta to the professionals and stick to whatever Americanized fusion nonsense you were aiming for.
Italians deserve better. And honestly, so do we. Arrivederci, Duchess, and for the love of all things al dente, put down the skillet.
