It was just revealed that during a recent service members' award ceremony, none other than the Exile Prince Petulant himself made a surprise virtual cameo. And let me tell you, it was cringeworthy to the max. The imperious victim, currently wallowing away in his palatial Montecito estate, decided to grace American troops with his unsolicited presence.
During the ceremony, Harry filmed a rather awkward video message that played, opening with a classic Harry word salad about his distinct honor of bestowing this year's Soldier of the Year award upon some veteran he once presented with Invictus medals. You know, credentials he desperately needs to remind people of, given his laughable treatment of those very same communities as disposable PR accessories.
But here's where the real secondhand humiliation kicks in. According to multiple reports, Harry took things to a new level of delusion by appearing fully suited up in his military regalia, with his prized military medals brazenly hanging off his chest for all to see.
Can you even fathom the gall of rocking ill-gotten military chest candy while parading your way through a heartfelt sermon about your profound appreciation for selfless valor? It's beyond belief.
You can practically picture the scene: Harry tossing his artfully tousled hair one last time as his glam squad scurries to get the shot framed just right for their temporary home studio. A few overly conscious inhales and exhales as he tamps down the narcissistic need to make the entire pageantry about himself for just one solitary moment. But of course, the unearned ego wins out.
By the time the recording light turns on, Prince Harry launches into his richly marbled mouth monologue about being honored to fet this year's winners, all while puffing out his suit jacket's chest with a flourish to properly accent those gleaming, ostentatious military adornments.
You can actually see the disdain curling across Harry's guiltless face as the plaudits he was clearly envisioning fail to fully materialize. The nebulous constipated sneer that always seems to materialize whenever he's not receiving the precise, rigidly inflated amount of applause, affirming his perpetually aggrieved victim complex.
But let's be honest here. If anyone deserves to be on the receiving end of withering derision and comprehensive humiliation from all corners, it's the supercilious rebel who is Prince Harry of Montecito. At least, while he insists on carrying himself with such an undisguised air of rampant condescension.
Because at the end of the day, his convenient costume change back into battered military fatigues notwithstanding, while lending a charitable veneer of half-baked royal thanks abroad, he was never more than a punchline transgressing upon actual fierce warriors who routinely put their lives on the line.
So for that upper-crust dilettante to try annexing the valor of those real battlefields for his own credibility while he leeches off Daddy's luxe estate is a grotesque insult to any rational-minded observer.
Harry's doubling down on stealing cherished valor while actively antagonizing the roots and influences and assets is truly a kit of death in the whole sad saga. Even after perspiring his way up the ladder to flee aristocratic trappings, everyone's dreamed-of Baby Bro paradoxically insists on weaponizing those very credentials.
It would be one thing if his shameless embrace of the mantle went hand in hand with steadfast adherence to his attendant noble obligations. But instead, we're dealing with an oversized child in an adult's body who believes grifting away every inherited privilege somehow makes him a real-world answer to liberationist philosophy.
The more he chaotically shape-shifts between both personas, the more bewildering and hapless he becomes. Someday he's casually appropriating his heritage for street cred, the next he's using his strange family ties as a lead supplement to some sordid autobiography.
But hey, at least he's a bottomless well of pity cringes and secondhand embarrassment we can reliably turn to for cringe-worthy validation.
