After being booted from Frogmore Cottage by King Charles, Harry and Meghan decided to embark on a little European spree. But we're not talking about picking up some tacky souvenirs here. Nope, they’ve reportedly bought themselves a vacation home in Portugal. Now, I don’t know about you, but when I get evicted, my first idea isn’t to go buy a house in Europe.
Speaking of cash, let’s dive into where this money might be coming from. Because, honestly, something smells fishier than a sardine factory. Remember how their so-called charity, Archewell, was mysteriously short $6 million in their tax reports? I mean, come on, you don’t have to be Sherlock Holmes to connect the dots here. It's like they're not even trying to hide it anymore! They might as well have slapped an Archewell Fund sticker on their luggage and jetted off to Portugal.
Oh, and let’s not forget, this little real estate venture comes hot on the heels of them crying poverty. Boohoo, they can’t afford police protection in the UK, but somehow, they can manage a European vacation home?
Now, some of you might be thinking, "Maybe this is a cry for help." Unless the family can offer them another Netflix deal or a chance to play the victim on Oprah, of course. No, my friends, this is all about image and sticking it to the Royals. It’s like a toddler saying, “You can’t fire me, I quit!” Except, in this case, it’s “You can’t evict us, we’re just going to buy our own place!”
But here’s the kicker: they might have outsmarted themselves. The IRS doesn’t take kindly to people playing fast and loose with charity funds. Can you imagine the scene? Meghan, sipping on her overpriced almond latte, suddenly gets the call: “Hello, this is the IRS. We have some questions about your recent purchase.” I bet that designer mug hit the floor faster than you can say “protocol breach!”
And poor, naive Harry. He’s probably still wondering what to do next. Reality check, anyone? But let’s be real for a sec—are we really surprised? This is Meghan. What Meghan wants, Meghan gets. This is the woman who waltzed into the royal family thinking she could revolutionize a thousand-year-old institution overnight. The same woman who couldn’t handle being at the center of attention for more than five minutes.
As for Harry, he’s so far under Meghan’s spell, he probably thinks this Portugal purchase is a brilliant move. “Yes, darling, buying a house with questionable funds while we’re under financial scrutiny is exactly what we should do,” he’s probably saying.
But here’s what really gets me, folks. While these two are out there playing real-life Monopoly with who knows whose money, the real royals—William, Kate, and the gang—are out there actually working. They’re showing up day in and day out, supporting charities, representing the UK, and being upstanding. You don’t see William and Kate buying European vacation homes every time someone looks at them funny, do you? No, because they understand what it means to be a part of the royal family.
And that, my friends, is the real tragedy in all of this. Harry used to get it. He used to be right there alongside William, doing the work and making his mother proud. And now? Now he’s nothing more than a puppet, zancing to Meghan’s tune.
So what’s next for our troubled duo? Well, if there’s any justice in the world, it’ll be a nice, long chat with some very serious men in suits, armed with lots of questions about their financial records. Maybe they can write a book about that experience too—*Spare Change*, perhaps?
In all seriousness, though, folks, Harry and Meghan are in this for themselves. They’re not interested in charity unless it benefits them. So, to all my loyal viewers out there who’ve been on this wild ride with me, watching the Harry and Meghan show unfold, I say this: stay vigilant and keep your eyes open. Because if there’s one thing we know about these two, it’s that they always have another trick up their sleeves.
And to Meghan and Harry, if by some miracle you’re watching this, I have a message for you: *The jig is up*. The world is watching, and we’re not buying what you’re selling anymore. It’s time to face the music and maybe remember what it means to be a real royal. But who am I kidding? That would require self-awareness, something that seems to be in short supply in the Sussex household.
So, there you have it, folks. Another day, another Sussex scandal. Will they ever learn? Will they ever change? Or will they keep digging themselves a deeper hole? Only time will tell.
