This time, Megan Markle has set her sights on Oscar-winning director Alexander Payne, attempting to replicate his career moves as if she were method-acting her way into relevance. The result? An embarrassing, cringe-worthy imitation that has left Payne himself chuckling at her sheer audacity.
Let’s start with Megan’s latest ambition: working in a restaurant kitchen. On the surface, it’s a noble pursuit—if only it weren’t such a transparent attempt to rewrite history. Reports suggest Megan reached out to restaurateur Alice Waters, expressing interest in interning at Chez Panisse. Yes, the same Megan Markle who trademarked a lifestyle brand before actually having one, and who treats work as a concept best left to others, now wants to intern at a restaurant.
Here’s where the real comedy kicks in. Megan’s sudden desire to don an apron and embrace the culinary arts feels eerily similar to something Alexander Payne did years ago. Payne, a celebrated filmmaker and screenwriter, took a break from Hollywood in 2014 to work at Chez Panisse following the passing of his brother. Unlike Megan, Payne had an actual connection to food—he’s a well-known foodie whose family owned restaurants. He didn’t go there for clout; he went for the experience, to immerse himself in the craft.
Meanwhile, Megan appears to be playing yet another one of her many roles, this time as a humble kitchen intern. Coincidence? Hardly. Megan has known about Payne for years. Back in 2012, she posted on Instagram about visiting the Hitching Post Winery, a key location in Payne’s Oscar-winning film *Sideways*. She even gushed over the movie, calling it a “masterpiece.” So, let’s not pretend she wasn’t aware of Payne’s time at Chez Panisse.
Megan’s entire modus operandi revolves around absorbing inspiration from others and rebranding it as her own. She’s always been behind the curve. Even in 2012, when she posted about *Sideways*, the film was already eight years old. Megan operates on a delayed timeline, as if pop culture has to simmer for a decade before she acknowledges it. Now, she’s trying to make “fetch” happen by replicating Payne’s journey—just with a lot more staged candids and curated lighting.
And let’s be real: Megan wouldn’t last a single shift in a professional kitchen. She’d have to pass a food safety program before even touching a cutting board, and we all know that’s not happening. The most she’s done on camera in her so-called cooking segments is garnish a dish before dramatically lamenting how hard it would be for her to work in a real kitchen due to “security concerns.” Security? Who’s going to attack you in a kitchen, Megan? A rogue spatula?
Alexander Payne is probably laughing his head off at Megan’s feeble attempt to copy his career moves. The Oscar-winning director, known for his authenticity and sharp wit, actually put in the work when he interned at Chez Panisse. Unlike Megan, whose idea of hard work is staging a perfectly lit photo op, Payne values real experience over performance. He’d likely find her latest reinvention as a culinary apprentice as amusing as the rest of us do.
If there’s one thing Alexander Payne is known for, it’s authenticity. He casts real people in his movies because he values genuine presence. Megan, on the other hand, is the exact opposite. Everything about her is an overacted, painfully rehearsed performance. She couldn’t be cast as an extra in one of Payne’s films because she lacks the one quality he values most: being real.
So, while Payne continues making brilliant films and living his truth, Megan will keep playing dress-up in her latest role: culinary apprentice.
