The state of America’s roads and bridges mirrors an economic depression. You might think you voted for Donald Trump, but in reality, you voted for Elon Musk. Yes, Elon Musk—Ohio’s unofficial president.
In a bizarre twist, the VA crisis response hotline now denies veterans in-person counseling or PTSD support, replacing these services with VetAI, an AI-powered system by Grok, an X company. The message? “President Trump and Doge Chairman Musk thank you for your service and for helping us eliminate waste. Have a nice day.”
Meanwhile, the Lincoln Project, the anti-Trump supergroup that feels like the Avengers but with more lawsuits and fewer capes, has unleashed a fresh wave of parody ads so brutal they’d make Deadpool wince. These ads are a masterclass in trolling, targeting Trump’s legal woes, his infamous Ukraine call, and even his wine-selling ventures.
One ad features a mock infomercial for a “Meltdown Survival Kit,” complete with a tiny violin, a mirror labeled “Look at Me,” and a stress ball shaped like a subpoena. Trump’s reaction? Pure preschool theater. Reports from Mar-a-Lago claim he’s been storming around, yelling at portraits of Andrew Jackson and demanding his staff sue the Lincoln Project for being “mean.”
The Lincoln Project, however, is thriving. Their ads have more views than Baby Shark, their merch is flying off the shelves (“Make Republicans Critical Again” hats for $45), and they’re live-tweeting Trump’s meltdowns like they’re hosting The Bachelor finale.
“We’re not just fighting Trump; we’re his content team,” joked a strategist. “He’s our Logan Paul—minus the charisma.”
Every time Trump freaks out, the Lincoln Project drops another ad. It’s like poking a bear, except the bear is made of lawsuits, spray tan, and existential dread.
A group of fed-up Republicans, fueled by caffeine and done with Trump’s chaos, sit around a conference table that’s seen better days. “We’ve tried policy. We’ve tried logic,” one groans. “What if we just meme him into oblivion?”
And just like that, America’s most unlikely troll army was born. These aren’t your grandpa’s GOP strategists. They’ve traded PowerPoint presentations for Photoshop, policy debates for TikTok dances, and press conferences for viral takedowns.
Their war room is a chaotic blend of “Make Republicans Critical Again” merch, whiteboards covered in Trump Meltdown Bingo, and a guy in the corner perfecting the Renegade dance for morale.
Their ads? Pure comedy gold. From a fake job posting for Trump’s legal team (“Ability to lie on live TV required”) to a parody audiobook narrated by Don Jr. (The Art of the Steel: How to Lose Friends and Incite Subpoenas), the Lincoln Project has turned political satire into an art form.
Trump, meanwhile, is melting faster than a snowman in Mar-a-Lago’s sauna. Sources say he’s been spotted yelling at a printer because it didn’t understand his “perfect tweet” about election fraud and demanding a TikTok tutorial from Melania.
The Streisand Effect: Trump’s Unintentional Boost to the Lincoln Project
The Streisand Effect—that magical phenomenon where trying to hide something turns it into a global sensation—is in full swing. Trump is currently its unofficial ambassador, giving a masterclass in how to accidentally make your enemies famous.
Here’s how it works: The Lincoln Project drops a parody ad so savage it would make a velociraptor flinch. Trump sees it, melts down, and unleashes a Truth Social rant. Millions of people, fueled by morbid curiosity, Google the ad. Views skyrocket, memes multiply, and the Lincoln Project’s ad revenue triples.
“Thanks, Donnie,” the Lincoln Project quips.
Trump, meanwhile, is out here acting like a human megaphone for his own haters. Every “RINO losers” tweet is essentially a free ad, turning obscure parody videos into viral sensations.
The Lincoln Project isn’t just trolling Trump for laughs. They’re weaponizing humor to shake up the political landscape. And Trump? He’s playing right into their hands, proving their point with every tweet.
“We know how his brain works,” a strategist smirked. “He sees a meme, he has to respond. It’s like dangling a laser pointer in front of a cat.”
The result? Trump’s ego is on fire—literally, if you count that public service announcement about his hair catching flames.
