Meghan has set her sights on none other than Hollywood darling Drew Barrymore. And what was Drew’s unforgivable crime? Did she expose Meghan’s ever-changing life stories? Did she dare to outshine the woman who has built an entire persona around playing the victim? No, her offense was far more shocking.
According to Lady Colin Campbell, Meghan and her royal entourage were absolutely horrified that Drew Barrymore had the nerve to breach royal protocol and *touch* her without permission. Now, let’s take a moment to appreciate the sheer **hypocrisy** of this situation. Meghan Markle—the self-proclaimed “hugger-in-chief,” the woman who has built her brand around being a *relatable*, *down-to-earth* duchess—is suddenly clutching her royal pearls over an unsolicited embrace?
This is the same Meghan who has spent years aggressively bear-hugging unsuspecting victims with her overzealous embraces. But of course, in Meghan’s world, her unsolicited touching is totally acceptable—because *she* is royal. Newsflash: she **isn’t.**
Ah yes, let’s not forget Meghan’s long history of disregarding *actual* royal protocol:
- Walking in front of the late Queen Elizabeth? **Check.**
- Ignoring royal dress codes? **Check.**
- Refusing to follow the order of royal seniority? **Big old check.**
She even had the audacity to push herself next to the Queen as if she outranked the heir to the throne. Because in Meghan’s mind, she wasn’t just a duchess—she was *born* royal. And yet, here she is, suddenly concerned with royal protocol *when it suits her.*
The woman who flouted every rule in the book during her time as a working royal now expects an A-list actress—an actress who has been *actual* Hollywood royalty since childhood—to treat her with the reverence of a reigning monarch? If we’re being honest, **Drew Barrymore is more royal than Meghan Markle will ever be.**
Drew comes from a long lineage of Hollywood nobility, spanning generations of acclaimed actors. Meanwhile, Meghan’s most notable Hollywood credit? Holding a briefcase on *Deal or No Deal* and a forgettable role on *Suits.*
Drew is beloved, talented, and accomplished. Meghan, on the other hand, has spent the past few years whining about being “oppressed” while living in a multi-million-dollar mansion in Montecito. And let’s be real—*The Drew Barrymore Show* is practically a love fest. Drew hugs *everyone.* That’s her thing. But Meghan, ever the opportunist, saw this moment as another chance to remind us peasants that she’s *above* us.
Perhaps the most satisfying part of this saga? How effortlessly Drew seemed to *royally Markle* Meghan on her own show. Observers noted the **subtle shade**, the **knowing look**, the **deliberately affectionate energy**—the way Drew was *all over* Meghan, while Meghan? Clearly uncomfortable. Her rapid blinking, the awkward hand movements—classic *I’m pretending to be a normal person* Meghan behavior.
At the end of the day, Meghan Markle is **not** royal. Not by birth, not by status, and certainly not by behavior. She is, at best, *royal-adjacent.* And considering she managed a grand total of **72 working days** before quitting royal duties, it’s safe to say she didn’t exactly earn her stripes.
She married a prince, complained about the job, abandoned her duties, and now expects the world to treat her like a *reigning queen.* Sorry, Megs, but the only throne you’ll ever sit on is the one in your **Montecito mansion’s** lavish bathroom.
So, to summarize: Meghan Markle—professional victim and hypocrisy champion—is upset that Drew Barrymore treated her like a *normal human being.* The irony? Almost too much to handle.
