Just when we thought we'd finally uncover the secret to crafting the perfect avocado toast, the dream has crumbled faster than a stale scone. Reports are circulating that Meghan Markle’s ambitious cooking show, which was allegedly set to debut on Netflix, has been served an eviction notice before it even had a chance to air.
After securing a $100 million Netflix deal, Meghan and Harry rolled out *Polo*, a five-part documentary series that no one asked for. This behind-the-scenes look at elite equestrian players was supposed to dazzle with high society glamour. Instead, it left viewers yawning louder than an overworked barista at 5 a.m. Critics panned the series as boring, tedious, and a niche vanity project that felt more like a bad spoof of a *Succession* background gag.
The fallout was swift. Now, Meghan's cooking, gardening, and entertaining extravaganza — tied to her now-defunct lifestyle brand, American Riviera Orchard — is reportedly teetering on the brink of cancellation. According to sources, Meghan’s culinary dreams are now on Netflix’s chopping block. This decision is a make-or-break moment for the Sussexes' supposed TV empire. Spoiler alert: It’s breaking.
A Netflix insider hinted that Meghan’s venture might still happen if she can salvage her floundering lifestyle brand. But given her track record, the likelihood of this happening seems as slim as Harry’s remaining friends in the royal family.
Apparently, Meghan's idea of culinary genius involves handpicking loaves of banana bread that her assistant slaved over, then posing for Instagram-worthy shots to claim them as her own. Sounds authentic, right? And don’t forget the tablescapes. Word has it that Meghan prefers to yell at assistants until the decor matches her exacting Pinterest aesthetic.
Then there’s Harry. While he co-executive produced *Polo*, critics couldn’t help but point out that this was yet another project leaning heavily on his passions. Meghan’s rumored cooking show was supposed to be her time to shine, but instead, it's allegedly being shoved into Netflix’s “never going to happen” folder.
It’s telling, though, that while Harry’s *Invictus Games* docuseries and *Polo* escapades are floundering, Meghan seems to be sprinting away from the wreckage faster than a royal exiting a family dinner. Insiders claim staff are actively avoiding Meghan and Harry. Case in point: Meghan's conspicuous absence at Oprah’s surprise birthday bash for Gail King. Her absence was as loud as the criticism surrounding her Netflix projects. Apparently, showing up to events they’re rumored to attend is becoming a social faux pas.
Can you imagine the whispers at those Beverly Hills brunches? "Oh darling, we simply must keep our distance from the Sussexes. So last season." The real Netflix hit here would be a documentary on what it’s like to work with Meghan and Harry. Forget tablescapes and banana bread — give us the dirt on the tantrums, the rewritten scripts, and the egos. Now *that* would be worth watching.
Until then, we’ll have to make do with leaked rumors about Meghan's supposed cooking press. Word on the street is that her banana bread recipe involves waking up at 4 a.m., jetting off to an African housing estate, and baking it there for maximum authenticity. Don’t have access to a private jet? Sorry, you're just not doing it right.
Look, it's no secret Meghan wanted a show to catapult her into the lifestyle queen stratosphere alongside figures like Martha Stewart or Gwyneth Paltrow. But this wasn’t manifestation — it was desperation. Rumors suggest that she filmed something on her own dime and handed it to Netflix like an eager intern begging for approval. With *Polo* dead in the water and Netflix’s patience wearing thin, it seems the streaming giant decided to cut its losses.
So Meghan’s cooking show wasn’t just canceled; it was over before it even began. But hey, at least we got some juicy Schadenfreude out of the whole debacle.
