Sarah Ferguson and Meghan Markle initially seemed destined for a strong friendship, given their similar backgrounds and shared experiences within the royal family. However, a pivotal moment shifted their relationship’s trajectory, highlighting the complexities of royal life and personal dynamics.
On the surface, both duchesses have much in common, particularly their struggles within the monarchy. Sarah Ferguson, who married Prince Andrew, faced immense scrutiny throughout their decade-long marriage, which ended in an amicable separation in 1992. Having experienced the intense pressures of royal life firsthand, she understands the expectations and limitations imposed on members of the monarchy. Despite still residing with Andrew at Royal Lodge when in the UK, Sarah has endured hardships, including being sidelined by the royal family and rebuilding her life in America after years of exclusion from key royal events.
Initially, Meghan and Sarah's relationship seemed promising. They both had firsthand knowledge of the royal pressures that come with being in the spotlight. However, over time, their connection became strained. Sarah herself admitted she does not know Meghan well, suggesting that their bond never truly deepened.
Their story began in October 2016, when Meghan met Sarah at Royal Lodge in Windsor. Prince Harry wanted his aunt to be among the first royals to meet his new partner. However, an awkward moment arose when the Sussexes realized the late Queen was present, and Meghan was unprepared for the required royal customs, particularly the curtsy.
During her interview with Oprah Winfrey, Meghan recounted how Harry informed her she would be meeting his grandmother. Fortunately, Sarah quickly stepped in to help. Recognizing Meghan’s uncertainty, she demonstrated the proper way to curtsy right outside Royal Lodge before they went in. This brief lesson helped Meghan navigate the formalities before meeting Queen Elizabeth II. Harry later described this moment in his memoir Spare, highlighting Sarah’s role in easing Meghan’s nerves and ensuring she addressed the Queen correctly, transitioning from “Your Majesty” to a more familiar greeting.
Sarah Ferguson made a significant return to royal life when she attended Harry and Meghan’s wedding in May 2018. This was a momentous occasion, as she had been excluded from many royal events in the past due to scandals. While Queen Elizabeth had a soft spot for her former daughter-in-law, Prince Philip reportedly saw her as “odd and pointless,” leading to her exclusion from many key gatherings.
Despite these past setbacks, Sarah was deeply honored to be invited to Harry and Meghan’s wedding. In an interview on Good Morning Britain, she expressed her joy, saying she felt happy for her late friend Princess Diana and grateful for the invitation. However, her excitement was overshadowed when she was reportedly upset about being excluded from the evening reception at Frogmore House, a more intimate gathering reserved for close friends and family.
Tensions between Sarah and Meghan intensified in October 2018 at Princess Eugenie’s wedding to Jack Brooksbank. Meghan’s decision to announce her pregnancy on Eugenie’s special day sparked criticism. Investigative journalists Dylan Howard and Andy Tillett, in their book Royals at War, described this as a major social misstep that angered several family members, including Sarah.
Speculation about a rift between the two women grew when Sarah posted a picture of her wedding attire on social media shortly after Kensington Palace announced Meghan’s pregnancy at 8:40 a.m. on Sarah’s 59th birthday. The timing of her post, which made no mention of the Sussexes, fueled rumors that she was displeased with how events unfolded.
Despite rumors of friction, Sarah has publicly defended Meghan and Harry during challenging times. When their controversial Oprah interview aired, she expressed admiration for Oprah and offered words of encouragement to the Sussexes. She stated, “I wouldn’t presume to give advice to the Duke and Duchess of Sussex, except to say to be happy.”
Sarah has often reflected on her close friendship with Princess Diana and believes Diana would be proud of Harry and Meghan’s family. She has emphasized the importance of avoiding judgment, especially regarding the Sussexes’ decision to step back from royal duties. Speaking candidly, she once said, “I don’t believe anyone has the right to judge another person. I have been judged all my life, and I have no judgment on the Sussexes.”
As Harry and Meghan faced difficulties, including being asked to vacate Frogmore Cottage, Sarah expressed empathy toward Harry’s decision to move. In an interview with The Telegraph, she reflected on her own experience of living in America post-divorce, saying, “I spent 12 years in America writing books, and it was a wonderful place for me. I felt free there.” This statement showcased her understanding of Harry’s choice to relocate.
Although Sarah admitted she does not know Meghan well, she has conveyed confidence that Meghan genuinely loves Harry, which she sees as the most important thing. When asked whether Meghan had harmed the royal family, Sarah chose diplomacy over criticism, focusing instead on the happiness the couple has found together. “She has made Harry very happy, and that is so nice. He’s so happy with her, and I think that’s beautiful. Diana would be proud of him and their lovely grandchildren.”
At a recent event promoting her book A Most Intriguing Lady, Sarah was asked what advice she would give Harry and Meghan about navigating their public marriage. Rather than offering specific guidance, she emphasized the importance of leading by example and letting actions speak for themselves. This reflects her approach to dealing with the challenges of royal life with resilience and grace.
Sarah, who maintained a strong bond with Princess Diana, believes both Diana and King Charles would be proud of their grandchildren. She has also stressed the value of forgiveness, suggesting that it plays a crucial role in maintaining family relationships amid the complexities of royal life.
The relationship between Sarah Ferguson and Meghan Markle is complex, shaped by shared experiences, misunderstandings, and evolving dynamics. While they never developed the close friendship some anticipated, their interactions highlight the broader narrative of royal life’s challenges, family dynamics, and the enduring legacy of love and support that binds them together.